It's my birthday fuckers! Recognize!!!!!
I want a pony, and bitches, and beer! Yeah, beer. Ya heard?
Saturday, July 29, 2006
Saturday, July 8, 2006
Best porn name EVER
So I'm at work today (unfortunately), just doing some basic searches on the files I haven't looked at. What do I come across, you ask?
Random file...guy's name is Brandon somethin. I put his name into google, like I do with all my debtors, and BOOM, like 500 matches. That's not unusual in itself, since common names bring up lotsa stuff. But this dude, he was the only person in the US with this name.
What is on all these google pages, you ask?
Apparently my debtor runs a porn company. Again, not that unusual, I've plenty of debtors in the "flesh industry".
But this guy had one distinguishing feature that totally cracked me up. His porn name (and company name)...
Butterballs McFadden.
WTF? I laughed just typing it out again.
Random file...guy's name is Brandon somethin. I put his name into google, like I do with all my debtors, and BOOM, like 500 matches. That's not unusual in itself, since common names bring up lotsa stuff. But this dude, he was the only person in the US with this name.
What is on all these google pages, you ask?
Apparently my debtor runs a porn company. Again, not that unusual, I've plenty of debtors in the "flesh industry".
But this guy had one distinguishing feature that totally cracked me up. His porn name (and company name)...
Butterballs McFadden.
WTF? I laughed just typing it out again.
Thursday, July 6, 2006
Hellmuth at his finest
This is a final table I HAVE to see on TV when it eventually airs. Hellmuth is TV gold, and here's two examples why:
Example 1:
"Phil Hellmuth raises to $75,000 preflop. Eugene Todd reraises to $220,000 total. Hellmuth asks Todd, "Are you trying to donk off your stack with ace jack?". Hellmuth proceeds to fold and shows A-Q. Todd just grins as he flips over A-J. Hellmuth, of course, jumps up from the table in disbelief."
Example 2:
"On a board of QJ976 and over $400,000 already in the pot, Jeff Cabanillas moves all in. Hellmuth thinks for a few moments before mucking his hand. Cabanillas turns over A-K and Hellmuth knocks his chair over as he stands up in shock. The Cabanillas supporters in the crowd go wild and erupt in support, causing everyone in the Amazon Room to look over at the final table."
This Cabanillas guy is an amateur, apparently. That's a BALLSY move in any tourney, much less with 3 people left, and against Phil F'n Hellmuth!
Cabanillas and Hellmuth are heads up now for the bracelet, bout even in chips. Winner gets just over 818,000 dollars. 2nd place gets just over 423,000 dollars. If Hellmuth wins, he ties Doyle Brunson and Johnny Chan for the all-time lead in bracelets (10). But Chan's at the final table of the 7 stud event right now as well (but short stacked w/ 8 left).
First Dutch, now Hellmuth...this has been an awesome WSOP so far, and it just started!
Example 1:
"Phil Hellmuth raises to $75,000 preflop. Eugene Todd reraises to $220,000 total. Hellmuth asks Todd, "Are you trying to donk off your stack with ace jack?". Hellmuth proceeds to fold and shows A-Q. Todd just grins as he flips over A-J. Hellmuth, of course, jumps up from the table in disbelief."
Example 2:
"On a board of QJ976 and over $400,000 already in the pot, Jeff Cabanillas moves all in. Hellmuth thinks for a few moments before mucking his hand. Cabanillas turns over A-K and Hellmuth knocks his chair over as he stands up in shock. The Cabanillas supporters in the crowd go wild and erupt in support, causing everyone in the Amazon Room to look over at the final table."
This Cabanillas guy is an amateur, apparently. That's a BALLSY move in any tourney, much less with 3 people left, and against Phil F'n Hellmuth!
Cabanillas and Hellmuth are heads up now for the bracelet, bout even in chips. Winner gets just over 818,000 dollars. 2nd place gets just over 423,000 dollars. If Hellmuth wins, he ties Doyle Brunson and Johnny Chan for the all-time lead in bracelets (10). But Chan's at the final table of the 7 stud event right now as well (but short stacked w/ 8 left).
First Dutch, now Hellmuth...this has been an awesome WSOP so far, and it just started!
Monday, July 3, 2006
THE Hottest woman alive
Jakalope, baby. Katie B. Goddess.
WARNING - Video quality does not do her justice. Check my main pic for future reference. Watch, and drool.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyfYBZ5tk_w&search=jakalope%20upside
WARNING - Video quality does not do her justice. Check my main pic for future reference. Watch, and drool.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyfYBZ5tk_w&search=jakalope%20upside
Sunday, July 2, 2006
Hockey is my religion
Sunday night. 12:17AM. What have I done all day? Not a god damn thing. Woke up at noon, played some poker (very badly), tried to have a siesta at 4, but everyone in the free world decided that was the best time to phone me....so nap time didn't go so well. Woke up, played on the net, watched a documentary on metal, and now I sit here. Bored. Yesterday? Rolley Lake w/ Mikey and Shannon. Then Canada Day fireworks in White Rock. Friday? Poker at my house. Till dad got mad at the noise and short circuited the lights on the patio so everyone would leave. : )
Normally I write these things shithoused...I've only had a couple today, so I hope I can live up to my drunken wittiness. Probably not.
First off. Hockey.
Bye Jovo. YES. Hello Wille Mitchell. YES. Sedins for 3.575 a mil each? TOO MUCH. Luongo for 6.75 mil a year? Fucking right.
Wanna know how much confidence I have in my new personal hero, Roberto Luongo? As soon as I am sure what number he's gonna wear (might not wear # 1....Captain Kirk's number), I'm gonna get it thrown on my vintage jersey. I'm sure that means nothing to you, but to me, it's a pretty big step for me, as an always-skeptical Canucks fan. Look at it like this: Everyone with a canucks jersey that has a 44 on the back of it feels pretty stupid right now, since, NEWSFLASH, career killer don't play here no more. Same goes for the 55 jersey. (Phoenix?) Besides the mild autism these people experienced when they bought that 44 or 55 jersey in the first place, it pretty much means these people have to go buy new canucks jerseys now. I have enough confidence in my new messiah to know that I will see a stanley cup parade down robson street before I have to buy a new jersey.
Stanley Cup. Yeah I said it. I've never ever ever had this much confidence in my team. Take it from me. Hockey is my religion. My messiah is the real deal, folks. Get used to the name Roberto Luongo, you'll be hearing it a lot.
One more thing. If I see you with a 44 or 55 jersey on, I will boo you. I don't care where we are, or why you're wearing it. It's completely unacceptable as a fan. You might as well just throw on an american jersey and park your RV on my lawn. I will treat you with the same lack of respect.
Don't believe me? Ask Jess. At the world juniors, I booed a kid with an american jersey. In front of his family, and like 500 people. He was 6 years old, tops. I didn't just boo him. I stood there, and booed him for at least a minute, till him and his fat, redneck family waddled off. Hockey is my religion. I refuse to allow blasphemy in my presence. It's that simple.
As for the rest of the league....blah. Went to the draft. Was okay, but nuthin near the first draft I went to in Edmonton, long ago. Nothing earth shattering has happened on the market yet. Gerber to Ottawa was a bit of a surprise. The Sens not getting a money goalie makes no sense to me, personally. Defencemen have been horribly overpaid so far! 5 mil for Pavel Kubina? Are you fucking kidding me? This is why the leafs are so stupid. Ferguson has no concept of the new NHL. Pronger and Peca want outta Edmonton? What the hell went wrong there? Pronger probably Jeff Brown-ed one of his teammates wives, or vice versa. It's always about a woman, when a player NEEDS to leave a city for "personal reasons".
Next up? WSOP. Congrats to Dutch Boyd, for winning the Shorthanded NLHE event. 475 grand. I got 100 bucks of that! : ) So far, it looks like Danny Negreanu and Carlos Mortensen are playing their A games. For any of you that care, www.cardplayer.com has awesome coverage of everything that's going on. I'm in a fantasy poker league, where you pick 20 players who you think will cash the most at WSOP. It's pretty entertaining. Too bad my own online play has been fucking pathetic lately. Haven't had the focus necessary. I just can't seem to get my live game and online game going at the same time. Oh well, it will come.
Next up? Yeah, England lost. Portugal's goalie stole the game. Wayne Rooney can go and die. Nuff said.
Next up? Life. Not much going on. Had one of my best months ever at work. Will help to pay some shit off, start saving for a trip. And, for once, I shouldn't have any problem following it up with another good month. Normally I coast the month after a huge effort. I think I might finaly be over that. Motivation and work ethic are two of my biggest weaknesses, but I'm finding more and more original ways to keep my head in the game with consistency. More to come on that front.
Other than work, just been doing the same old shit. Endlessly debating where my next trip will end up being to. At the moment, planning a US only trip. It's more of a test run of the "survive on poker only" dream that I have. Obviously, my game is nowhere near optimal lately, so a lot would have to change before the trip could become reality. But it's a pretty interesting trip, relatively simple (train, bus, all english speaking), and completely affordable. Of course, there's also the trips Ive planned through Mexico and Central America, the South America trip, the rest of Europe trip, and the Japan trip. I hate being a travel addict. I know more about lotsa places than the actual people who live there. Why? Cuz I'm a huge fucking nerd.
Go listen to "rollin with saget".
Later.
Normally I write these things shithoused...I've only had a couple today, so I hope I can live up to my drunken wittiness. Probably not.
First off. Hockey.
Bye Jovo. YES. Hello Wille Mitchell. YES. Sedins for 3.575 a mil each? TOO MUCH. Luongo for 6.75 mil a year? Fucking right.
Wanna know how much confidence I have in my new personal hero, Roberto Luongo? As soon as I am sure what number he's gonna wear (might not wear # 1....Captain Kirk's number), I'm gonna get it thrown on my vintage jersey. I'm sure that means nothing to you, but to me, it's a pretty big step for me, as an always-skeptical Canucks fan. Look at it like this: Everyone with a canucks jersey that has a 44 on the back of it feels pretty stupid right now, since, NEWSFLASH, career killer don't play here no more. Same goes for the 55 jersey. (Phoenix?) Besides the mild autism these people experienced when they bought that 44 or 55 jersey in the first place, it pretty much means these people have to go buy new canucks jerseys now. I have enough confidence in my new messiah to know that I will see a stanley cup parade down robson street before I have to buy a new jersey.
Stanley Cup. Yeah I said it. I've never ever ever had this much confidence in my team. Take it from me. Hockey is my religion. My messiah is the real deal, folks. Get used to the name Roberto Luongo, you'll be hearing it a lot.
One more thing. If I see you with a 44 or 55 jersey on, I will boo you. I don't care where we are, or why you're wearing it. It's completely unacceptable as a fan. You might as well just throw on an american jersey and park your RV on my lawn. I will treat you with the same lack of respect.
Don't believe me? Ask Jess. At the world juniors, I booed a kid with an american jersey. In front of his family, and like 500 people. He was 6 years old, tops. I didn't just boo him. I stood there, and booed him for at least a minute, till him and his fat, redneck family waddled off. Hockey is my religion. I refuse to allow blasphemy in my presence. It's that simple.
As for the rest of the league....blah. Went to the draft. Was okay, but nuthin near the first draft I went to in Edmonton, long ago. Nothing earth shattering has happened on the market yet. Gerber to Ottawa was a bit of a surprise. The Sens not getting a money goalie makes no sense to me, personally. Defencemen have been horribly overpaid so far! 5 mil for Pavel Kubina? Are you fucking kidding me? This is why the leafs are so stupid. Ferguson has no concept of the new NHL. Pronger and Peca want outta Edmonton? What the hell went wrong there? Pronger probably Jeff Brown-ed one of his teammates wives, or vice versa. It's always about a woman, when a player NEEDS to leave a city for "personal reasons".
Next up? WSOP. Congrats to Dutch Boyd, for winning the Shorthanded NLHE event. 475 grand. I got 100 bucks of that! : ) So far, it looks like Danny Negreanu and Carlos Mortensen are playing their A games. For any of you that care, www.cardplayer.com has awesome coverage of everything that's going on. I'm in a fantasy poker league, where you pick 20 players who you think will cash the most at WSOP. It's pretty entertaining. Too bad my own online play has been fucking pathetic lately. Haven't had the focus necessary. I just can't seem to get my live game and online game going at the same time. Oh well, it will come.
Next up? Yeah, England lost. Portugal's goalie stole the game. Wayne Rooney can go and die. Nuff said.
Next up? Life. Not much going on. Had one of my best months ever at work. Will help to pay some shit off, start saving for a trip. And, for once, I shouldn't have any problem following it up with another good month. Normally I coast the month after a huge effort. I think I might finaly be over that. Motivation and work ethic are two of my biggest weaknesses, but I'm finding more and more original ways to keep my head in the game with consistency. More to come on that front.
Other than work, just been doing the same old shit. Endlessly debating where my next trip will end up being to. At the moment, planning a US only trip. It's more of a test run of the "survive on poker only" dream that I have. Obviously, my game is nowhere near optimal lately, so a lot would have to change before the trip could become reality. But it's a pretty interesting trip, relatively simple (train, bus, all english speaking), and completely affordable. Of course, there's also the trips Ive planned through Mexico and Central America, the South America trip, the rest of Europe trip, and the Japan trip. I hate being a travel addict. I know more about lotsa places than the actual people who live there. Why? Cuz I'm a huge fucking nerd.
Go listen to "rollin with saget".
Later.
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