Random!

10 random facts you may or may not know about me. I've been drinking and I'm bored...deal with it.



1. My eyes aren't one solid colour. I have a brown ring on the inside of the...umm...coloured part, and the outside half changes colours. Usually grey, sometimes green or blue. I'm already cooler than you thought I was, right?

2. I can't burp. Or puke. Well, I have actually done both, but they're very rare occurances in my life. Like eclipses or some shit. You have your fancy moon every 8 years, I upchuck in a bathtub. Not quite as romantic.

3. I can do 2 impressions. One is Grover, from Sesame Street. I got thrown off the skytrain once for doing the NEAR...FAR! skit, and running from one side of the train to the other for emphasis. Not my finest moment. The 2nd is Fat Albert...before you start in on the obvious heffer jokes, you gotta hear my HEY HEY HEY! The bitches flock to it.

4. I probably know more about jiu jitsu than you do, even though I've never worn a gi, rolled with anyone, or actually been in a gym since high school.

5. I've lost 11 housekeys since I moved in here. I've actually lost 3 of them in the bush beside the stairs/front door, cuz I dropped them trying to drunkenly get in the house at 5AM. Those fuckers bounce like you wouldn't believe.

6. I watch Dream videos a lot on YouTube. Remember them? Circa 2001 or so. I have no idea why. Before you watch one and point out they were 14 or some shit...I'll have you know they're perfectly legal now. So there.

7. I get to drink beer at work, and you don't.

8. I can do complicated 8 digit math in my head in seconds, but I can't pump gas, change a tire, or operate a motor vehicle. Well, I rode a jetski once, but I crashed it into a dock.

9. I can't afford a car, I use public transportation...I don't mind, I read till I reach my destination...sometimes a newspaper, sometimes a book...the amount of money I save, this shit is off the hook! Oh, and I get nervous in social situations, muthafucka! If ya got a pet cat, put ya hands up...if ya got a bad back, put ya hands up...

10. I owned a 98 Degrees CD a long time ago, till Danny threw it into the fireplace and stated "There, now it's 1500 degrees".